SAGAD, the CHAIN GANG and LATINO HEAT

IDOLIZE NONE, RESPECT ALL. HUSTLE. LOYALTY. RESPECT. SAGAD.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Hoping...

I don't know why I even bother typing up these things...
When I don't want anyone to know how I feel...

Weird, isn't it?
I guess,
The fact that no one really knows the whole story...

So all of you can guess what the hell I'm talking about..
And I'd never answer any of it.

I read a quote from my cousin's phone:
.."in love, never put yourself in a situation
where you're not sure
of where you stand in a person's life...
NEver assume, never expect..."

Well...
That's what I didn't do.
I assumed...
I expected...

STUPID ME!!!

I never felt this way before...

No one really liked me...
It was usually me who falls..

But you said you like me...

I didn't want to believe...
I didn't want to get hurt...
What if you were joking?
What if you were lying?
What if you were just playing around?

...

What if I said I like you?

...

so much?

...

And what I'm saying is true...

It hurts me to know all these things...

And I can't do anything about it.

I don't want to let this feeling go...

I don't want to let you go...

But once again,
That damn reason stops me from doing...

You're taken.

Shit.

I'm such a fool.

I don't even know why I'm doing this.

Somebody please answer me...

...

Maybe you want to answer me...

Try talking to me...

ARGGGHHH!!!!

Why am I still hoping?!?!?!

The alcohol, meds and feelings are swirling in my head...

Can't take this anymore.

I never wanted this to happen...

I didn't want to get hurt anymore...

But it's here...

I can't stop it...

I have to go with it.

Oh my.

I think I'm gonna go crazy.

Someone please help me.

2 Comments:

At 9:21 PM, July 03, 2006, Blogger xathanael said...

mac i don't want to tell you not to think about it beacause I know that in some way you will be reminded by something or someone. Just think of this cliche thought, he's not the only guy in the universe and he is not worth taking a second look at. I f i were in your position, i'd feel the same way. Yeah we all do have our own ups and downs. i felt sooooo sad when juan was blacklisted coz i really did feel comfortable with him and i think you felt the sadness too... Mac think of it this way, SAGAD ka at kinakikiligan ka. Hayaan mo siyang magsisi sa ginawa niya sa iyo. Don't mourn. Be happy and show what you got!

 
At 9:01 PM, July 07, 2006, Blogger Maccer da Packer said...

Thanks stephie weffie...

I REALLY MISS YOU GUYS.

 

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